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  • Mj Pettengill

From the Author's Pen: Know When You Are Called Upon


The Light and the Tree, CC0
The Light and the Tree, CC0

The amount of silence, openness, and reflection necessary to write or even speak the words that honor the souls that came before us is an extraordinary undertaking. To say that this process is overwhelming is an understatement at best. Also, believing that there is a beginning, middle, and end to these stories is a myth. If you are asked to go away, you must not. Instead, be ready and willing to stay.

Imagine sitting in the middle of a field of anonymous graves with nothing to go on but intuition. The book meant to record the names is blank, and the record keepers tell you to forget about it, about them. This is not an option, not for me. It is a defining moment, indeed.

As I have mentioned countless times, it is necessary to trust yourself to see in the dark. Even if the earth beneath your feet is perilously uneven, blanketed with thick, gnarled roots and rocks, you are meant for this. If it feels as if you may lose your footing, stop and hold your ground. You know about navigating these rigid places. However, after so much time has passed inside of this so-called light, we have been blinded. In this state of unseeing, we have become tragically severed from our very essence.

Intrinsic skills, like those in which we seek, remain out of sight, buried somewhere in there, in plain sight, in a tattered book or old box not meant to be found. What happens when you find what you are looking for? Do you walk away?

Know when you are called upon, to answer, and go where you must. Fear resides in these places. Initially, I doubted myself, believing that I didn’t know the way, but I was wrong. I knew then, as I know now, exactly what I must do, and that is anything but stop. There is a time to wander and a time to endure. This wandering—contemplation—demands stillness, patience, and a sacred space conducive to a meditative state.

This path to purification, by way of the inner world, is required to access the means to interpret one’s own soul. Without sufficient confidence and self-trust, the journey may be prolonged and more arduous. In whichever method you find yourself, there is no right or wrong. Unity and harmony are compulsory to inhabit both worlds—past and present.

Negativity, criticism, or distraction have the power to destroy the faith required to know that the soul can and will continue to be reached. Only when connected to the deepest part of the self, will thoughts flow without judgment.

These words must possess integrity, authentically honoring those mysteriously lost in the past in a manner that brings about healing through acknowledgment alone. Remember, they call out to you, to us, not for judgment, but to awaken because you bothered to know of their very existence. For it is they who were deemed fallen, damned, and irredeemable.

Never judge the past. To do so is to be in error. It is impossible to know the truth of that which occurred in any moment before our existence in the present physical plane. We do not have the right to do so. The virtue of re-membering the lost souls will undergo healing, releasing what you think you know, what you read, or have been told. The truth is there, but it is not where you think it resides. You carry it with you.

There is an unimaginable disappointment when one has experienced life within one’s own soul if that feeling cannot be reached again. It can take days, weeks, months, years, or in the worst case, never again to be accessed in this lifetime.

This is another reason for craving solitude. When alone, one may become brave. I summoned the courage to look deep within. Many creative people are fragile in this way. There is a great deal of universal noise that requires one to seek refuge to continue to hear the voices of the soul, including whispers of the ancestors.

Through years of trust and patience, I have opened to ancestor energy—the murmurs of those who have called out. Nellie, Nanatasis, is the one with great clarity. She is my guide, linking ancient wisdom with the present.

People ask if I have channeled these numbered souls. I am speaking of a world in dreamtime, one with which I can connect—at times, perceived as our waking world where we are right now.